almost there

[mute_clay]

Clay goes straight to Orlando’s after having left Alexander’s place. There’s a mail for him. He is too restless to type a long answer and settles for telling Orlando that everything is fine. Almost fine. That he will be all right. And that he wants to tell him about what happens but that he doesn’t have the words.

If I find them I will tell you.

He takes the key for Walker’s bus and gets a coat before leaving a note for Jimmy telling him that everything is all right. Still a lie. But he isn’t sure what to say otherwise.

The walk to Alan’s is uneventful. He has to drop of the key for David. See him if he is home.

It is – almost – time.

Comments

[davidshaw.livejournal.com]

"Don't leave her."

[mute-clay.livejournal.com]

I'm NOT leaving her.

I'm coming back. She knows I am.

[davidshaw.livejournal.com]

"She's alone with him and his fucking fan club. You don't know what it's like to be alone with him."

[mute-clay.livejournal.com]

Clay's shoulders shake a little.

David. Please. I -

If he doesn't get away he won't be able to hold his promise to Callie. He looks down at his hands. They've curled up like claws. He tries to relax them.

She WANTS to. Do you think I like that thought?
That she -

A deep breath. It doesn't work.

I have to go. I -

[davidshaw.livejournal.com]

"Okay." He looks tired. "Have a good trip. And thanks for the bus."

[mute-clay.livejournal.com]

A good trip. It almost makes him laugh.

{- Yes. Run. Yes. NOW. No pain. -}

He walks toward the door, then turns back to David.

Read the letter okay? It should be in the mailbox. And David? -

He spreads his arms a little.

Can I?

David can always pretend not to understand.

[davidshaw.livejournal.com]

David picks up the Monopoly set and hands it to him. "Don't forget this, it's yours."

He stands just out of reach. "I'll see you when you get back? As soon as you get back? After you see Callie? Come and see me, okay. So I know you came back."

[mute-clay.livejournal.com]

Clay takes the game and nods. He'd sort of expected that.

He points to David.

I'll stop by here first. Callie knows I'm coming back. And you can tell me whether I'm clean and fresh smelling enough to go see her.

He feels like crying.

{- NO. Run. Yes. -}

[davidshaw.livejournal.com]

David smiles. "I'll do a thorough smell test, Stinky."

[mute-clay.livejournal.com]

Clay smiles back. It's a shaky little smile. Then he leaves. The urge to run is overwhelming. He fights it.

He has to get David's gift back to the house first. And then - then he can run.